I am missing some awesome kitties right now. Kitties like Butler and Squeaky. I don't know whether Butler's ever coming back to this life and I don't know whether I'll ever be able to take care of Squeaky again either. But I really love them.

I'm going to be receiving Suplemental Security Income really soon, which despite being hardly anything, will still be much more than we've had. It'll be more stable and consistent at least. What I really want though, is a place that feels like home.

I'm exhausted. But I got myself to tidy up the place at least. I don't know what now. I just want to relax. I want to do something creative every once in a while, and to play ragnarok with my lover when he's up to it. Ragnarok is awesome because it's a great game that you can play with others. I don't have much that I can do with friends, or many friends to do stuff with. I just hope that someday I can get more of us playing Ragnarok together to have some fun.

I also hope that I can have the holidays to celebrate again. The thing that makes a holiday good, is if you can celebrate it with the people who love you and can show that they do. Otherwise it doesn't even feel like a holiday at all. And it's not about gifts. Besides, the best gift you can give someone, is yourself. To give them the time to show them you really care.

Everyone needs and deserves love. Love is the one thing that makes life worth living. I'm alive because I wanted to help people remember that. And to remember what love really means. My kitty baby Flickerwind is a great example of love... She's cuddling with me right now, as she usually always is. We both love each other no matter what. Of course myself and my lover are the very same way. Real love is always unconditional. As it should be.

Anyways, that's all I have to say right now. I'm going to spend time with my lover.