Welcome to my Blog
I am on a spiritual quest for healing
And to find my freedom from fear and self-induced limitations


Self Induced Limitations = Limited Growth
And I will not accept unnecessary limitations anymore.

I created this site because I needed to do a lot of serious spiritual venting.
For once, I am going to refuse to dislike myself.
I am also going to be honest with my thoughts and feelings.
If no one else, I must be honest with myself.
And above all, I must love myself.


I am a female. At least in this one physical life. And it doesn't really matter anyway.
The age of my current body has nothing to do with who I am, either.
Since I was a small child, I have had to endure many physical and emotional difficulties.
These include dysmorphophobia, chronic depression, chronic fatigue, low blood sugar and more.
I have experienced more trauma, abuse and loneliness in this life than my family may ever know.
I have undergone much emotional, spiritual, and intellectual bondage and abuse.
Not to mention that this has had incredibly negative impacts on my physical health as well.
And how did I live through the fact that my hardships were viewed as non-existent...
And that unrealistic expectations were constantly placed upon me.
I was raised into poverty, and am still struggling to get out of it.
Ultimately, I have also been rendered emotionally broken and socially dysfunctional.
But I have also survived. Changes shall manifest.


I am much stronger than people realize.


Epiphany #1: One particular organized religion has been the main cause of my life's tragedies.
Epiphany#2: Religion was a good idea, but just one of many concepts that has been warped and abused by humans.
Epiphany #3: Mormonism is a vicious pattern that has created misery and toxic relationships in my life, as well as others.
Epiphany #4: My mother loves me despite perpetual patterns of abuse. It's all she knows.


At the core, we are all lightworkers of goodness and love.
I am continually developing and healing, just as every soul is designed to do.
Although I am spiritually depressed and homesick much of the time, I also know I am not alone in this world.
It is time for human beings to evolve, and to move into a new age of peace, healing and love.

And it is also time for me to openly express myself!
My thoughts and emotions should be shared, not oppressed, and not repressed.
I do not intend to oppress nor offend anyone.
After all, diversity is a blessing, and needs to be accepted.
Diversity allows us to learn, and see things from many different angles and perspectives.
And the ability to truly listen, is far more important than the ability to agree.


Religion, spirituality, and morals, are all very separate things.
My intentions are solely in favor of open-mindedness, knowledge, spiritual growth and love.
And refusal to think freely and independently is disrespectful to yourself.
One should wield intellectual and free thought as a natural characteristic. Because it is.
What organized religion has taught me,
is that it religion is against real wisdom and freedom,
since its purpose is to control and abuse others.
To obey authority without question has too much room for oppression and abuse.
Without questioning, there is no learning. And without learning, there is no growth.
And where is the reflection of love; the core energy of which we are made?


I pray for the badly needed reform of this violent world.
I must express that there are loving alternatives to authoritarian organizations and religions,
and these alternatives can be more spiritually fulfilling and enjoyable than they may ever know.


We, as human beings, are not in the dark ages anymore.
So let us evolve and reflect that fact.


In Love and Peace,
~Mistress Taelle~






Welcome to Spiritual Freedom



Hi.

I am known as Taelle, or Mistress.

         If you don't already know me, then this site probably isn't for you. This is one of my journals, also known as a blog. I initially created this site because I want to be totally honest with myself and revive the good habit of keeping a journal. I want to be free to express myself, spiritually and otherwise.
         So here I am, and here it is:  My blog of Spiritual Freedom.




Things About Me

Evidently I am indigo and crystal soul. I am a very evolved and seasoned soul who often feels homesick, since Earth is not my true home. In relation to the earth angel realms I am many things. I consider myself a wolf, sorceress, elemental, angel, mermaid and starsoul. I am romantic and sensual. I am secretive, mysterious, more than shy of socializing but playful and creative. I am extremely sensitive... I have a residual anger towards humans but I will show them understanding and compassion anyway... even when they don't return it.

I have found my twin flame and I will always love him and be with him.

I love animals. I love wolves, kitties, dragons, dragonflies, unicorns, butterflies, and many other creatures. I love art, creativity, affection, fun and laughter. I love nature, rain and thunderstorms. I love water, and swimming. I am interested in astrology, astronomy, spirituality, oracle cards and various methods of divination. I love technology and magic. I love music. I also enjoy movies and games, especially computers and videogames. I love books and stories, and hope to finish writing my own. I love dreams and am largely fascinated by them... I love daydreams, fantasy, science fiction, and satire. I love learning.

I love kirbies!



I don't endorse religion.
But I don't condemn those who do.
I simply believe in Spirituality,
Open-mindedness and Integrity,
Freedom of Expression,
Understanding and Acceptance,
And most of all, LOVE.

Love is of the greatest importance,
In the entire universe.
And I would unravel and die
Before my soul ever believes otherwise.




I love my family.
I love my twin flame.
I love my best friend,
who is also my family.
I always strive to love others,
Whether I know them or not.
And even those who hate me,
I cannot hate them back,
Because hate constricts growth.
And love can heal anything.

This love is unconditional.
Despite confusion and conflicts.
And so, I must also accept myself,
And try to love myself,
No matter what.
Love is all that truly matters.

And our world is immensely suffering from such lack of its use.
Ego is NOT an appropriate
substitute for Love.
Ego keeps us from being able to truly love ourselves and others.
Ego creates un-love, which will only create more aspects of un-love.
Ego keeps change from happening.
Ego endorses fear, ignorance, hate and greed.
The policy of "every man for himself" does not work.
People are still hurting each other.
Stop listening to the Ego!

So let's stop waiting.
Everyone needs and deserves Love.
Let's create Love!

The new age is now.






~ I Love You! ~



Feel free to leave comments,
Or messages on the tagboard
Which is located further down.
You can also send email to
iviandara@aim.com

Or instant message me

at Aim:  The Taelle
or
at Yahoo:  cylon_toox

If you are nice, or neutral,
then I won't bite.
However, please do not contact me if you intend to utilize insults, or otherwise have low opinion of me.

Due to note:

I am not a spawn of Satan
I am not misguided
I am wrong or going to hell
I am not stupid
I am not naive
And I am not inferior,
nor superior,
to anyone else.

I am simply on my own path.
This is the way things are.

So please don't be ignorant.
I respect others as individuals.
And I would appreciate the same.
Please be conscientious,
as I too am a soul in need of love.

Otherwise...
Stop wasting your time with my blog.

Thank you.




~ Let's Be Free ~




If confused by the tagboard:

The bottom field is where your nickname or alias goes. The field above that is where you write your message, in order to add it to the existing messages in the largest field. The http:// field is optional, but it's there if you want to contribute an external link. Press the Submit button when you're done.

Have fun?




My iMood:  Read My Feelings
My Lover's iMood:  Read His Feelings
Best Friend's iMood:  Read Her Feelings


   


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The section below, is at least somewhat an expression of who I am.
These are my thoughts on some of the things I believe and don't believe.
I am not preaching "right or wrongs" to anyone.
These are my personal opinions
as everyone is entitled to their own.
So please don't get defensive,
though I can't help it if you read it and are offended.


I Believe -

-  In an obligation to Relax and have Fun.
-  That laughter is a lighthearted necessity.
-  That an uninhibited sense of humor is a refreshing form of enjoyment.
-  That spontaneity is also very refreshing and enjoyable.
-  That refusing to question authority is being disrespectful to yourself and your integrity.
-  That love is real and beautiful.
-  That human beings should love others as well as themselves.
-  That everyone is worthy of love.
-  That, with love, all things can grow.
-  That love knows no bounds.
-  That to view all things and situations with love, is a healing and peaceful way of life.
-  That there is nothing wrong with making mistakes, as long as you are learning from them.
-  That learning, in its various forms, is important, just as knowledge is power.
-  That the "sub-conscious" is just another word for our soul.
-  That, through this "sub-conscious", we can have access to endless knowledge, forgotten memories and other hidden power.
-  That all living beings have souls... With the exception of the little earthly automatons, cells, bacteria, and etc.
-  That earthly (or non-earthly) automatons, including insects, are living things of the earth that deserve respect, although they are not individual spirits.
-  That when we refuse to acknowledge our feelings, use our minds and utilize intellect, we "humans" aren't acting any better than mindless drones. I'm sorry but it just reflects the behavior of a termite colony... Or a Zerg colony. ("LIVE FOR THE SWARM!")
-  That humans are animals too. We are equal to other forms of life, not superior.
-  That reincarnation exists, and that "past lives", "next lives" and "pre existences" have the same meaning.
-  That reincarnation is about choice, and NEVER about punishment.
-  That reincarnation has various purposes, including, but not limited to, spiritual growth, enjoyment and learning.
-  We signed up for what we got... Every single time.
-  That reincarnation is not limited to the human existence, as there are other forms of "intelligent life", and they are just as significant as we are.
-  That Soul Mates exist; in that the actual definition of Soul Mates is, "Living Souls with whom we may have shared various pre-mortal and/or past-life experiences, and have previously agreed to meet once again."
-  That there are many types of Soul Mates.
-  That anyone, even relatives, or seeming "enemies", can be a type of Soul Mate to you.
-  That Soul Mates are here to assist us in our own personal life's journey, and to help heal situations (both past and present), whether we consciously realize it or not.
-  That man created "god" in the image of himself, and not the other way around.
-  That angels exist, as they are simply spirits, but those which resonate of pure love, because that is the energy of what god is.
-  That every living person has at least two guardian angels (or other spirit guides), who are always available to call upon for support.
-  That many guides and angels have been with me throughout my entire life, and that I am never alone.
-  That, because of the divine laws of Free Will, we are in control of our own destiny, and that is also why it is important to pray, and to give "permission" for our guides to "interfere" with our lives and give us assistance.
-  That magic exists, because it is of the same definition as prayer, and any other higher powers that can create miracles through manifestation.
-  That we can pray to call upon blessings, for our needs and desires to manifest.
-  That, for blessings and manifestations to work properly, at least some small degree of belief is required. As long as there is belief and good intent, prayer can work for anyone.
-  That, in order to receive those blessings, we must allow them to happen, and to accept them graciously, without endorsing feelings of guilt or unworthiness.
-  That anyone and anything we encounter is giving us a chance learn something.
-  That everyone has the hidden potential to unlock the secrets of claivoyance and to utilize psychic abilities.
-  That, although there have been many fraudulent practices, lies, and abuse in the subject of psychic power, there are also valid Clairvoyants and Psychic people, throughout history.
-  That true Psychics, far more often than not, are truly very warm and loving people who desire to help others. They just have to make a living for themselves, too.
-  That divination and psychic abilities exist, and are not limited to predicting the future, but can give profound insight to any situation, as well as revealing hidden knowledge about the past, present, and oneself.
-  That the world is entering a new phase right now, not necessarily ending. We are beginning a new age, vibrations are changing, and change is necessary and even inevitable. Besides, there is truly no such thing as an ending without a new beginning.
-  That our subconscious self (our souls) are ALREADY develloped, and all-knowing. We, as physical-based beings, simply struggle to tap into different levels consciousness.
-  That we, our true soul forms, were made as a part of, and are one with, the ultimate divine source (God, Spirit, or whatever you want to call it). We are not separate, and we are not inferior, nor superior.



I Don't Believe -

-  In the Bible, or any other "scriptures" or "gospels" of this world. They are written and changed by men. I cannot appreciate it when anyone takes the Bible seriously or literally. It is an untruthful, oppressive book of man, and it is not of God. However, that doesn't mean that we can't learn from it.
-  In authoritarian Religion. Some people tend to find comfort in it, but I have also seen how much pain and problems it can cause. It's mainly just there to control and manipulate.
-  In the practice of blind obedience.
-  That Satan exists. (Unless he is a crazy mushroom! Lol, not really.)
-  That killing, infliction of pain, or any acts of hate or violence, have EVER been endorsed by GOD. (Don't you remember the commandment, "Thou shalt not kill"?)
-  That God could ever represent or personify anything that is contradictory of pure Love and Acceptance.
-  That God would ever give us orders, especially through the word of man and his writing, and expect us to obey without question.
-  That God could practice or endorse punishment, or ANY form of force at all.
-  That discrimination against a person or living being is EVER justified. Differences should be embraced, not attacked!
-  That there is any such thing as a "superior" gender, race, religion, or otherwise.
-  That the traditional view of "Hell" could EVER exist. But I do believe, that sometimes there is hell in mortality, particularly when humans attempt to judge and punish each other. Yet in the afterlife, there is only "Hell" if we feel that we deserve to be judged and punished as well, and therefore we "condemn" ourselves by inflicting self-torture. But this ends when we realize that everyone deserves love and happiness... Including ourselves!





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Sunday, April 05, 2009
Yes, it's been a long time.

I am going to post my response to an email from 2005, although even the email response was four years late. I simply needed something to help me write, and to have something to show my best friend, whether she has the time soon or not. While writing journal entries has otherwise proven too difficult of a task, surveys are great for me because they provide me with specific questions, where I can be as flexible as I want with my answers. I can be as detailed, brief, serious, or silly as I want to be. But no matter how I do this, hopefully somebody can learn something about me.

Lately, there has been much chaos in my life, mostly concerning emotions, and I obviously haven't been able to write about this. It is too difficult to take the time to try and explain an endless bombardment of emotions or events, especially the events that have occurred in the past five months or so. This year has already been very long for me, although the last month was also extremely boring and uninspiring. Maybe sometime later I will summarize some things that have happened since I last wrote, or at least make another long survey of my own so that this blog is not neglected. Just don't expect too much from me, as I simply want to do things that let me feel free from stress, and hopefully much happier than I have been. If writing in a journal helps me with this, and if I have time and feel able, then I will be updating here again soon.

Anyway, here is the email response to my best friend Enel, since she happened to send me this survey December of 2005. They are my answers to the survey, so that I have something interesting to throw into this blog today.



 1. What is your Full Name?
It depends on which name you are asking for. The name my parents gave me is evil to me, so I don't want to have to think about it anymore. My spirit name, on the other hand, which is the name I am called by those who really care and respect me, is Taelle Oreseth.



 2. What color jeans are you wearing right now?
I'm not wearing pants.
 
    ...
    LOL
Don't worry, I've got yellow underwear.

 

 3. What are you listening to right now:
A song from Mario64, because Dethy is playing videogame music in winamp. I'm also hearing Dethy eat. e_e


 4. What are the last 2 digits of your phone number:
00. Isn't that unique?
 

 5. What was the last thing you ate?
Uhh... A vanilla wafer? Actually, it tastes more like lemon flavor than vanilla to me. I haven't had a meal today, and I don't know if I'll feel like having one.
 

 7. How is the weather right now:
    I don't really know, because there is a huge tree always blocking our window. And I don't usually care to pay attention to the weather lately, unless it happens to be significantly affecting the temperature in here.
    What I do know, is that this survey is missing question number 6.


 8. Last person you talked to on the phone?
I guess my mom. And not for long, because she's always more interested in someone else calling her, something on the internet, something on TV, her dog barking, or just anything that doesn't have to do with me.


 9. First thing you notice about the opposite sex:
...That they are male. What am I supposed to say?


 10. Do you like the person who sent this to you?
    Link: How about a kiss?
    Ganon: NOOOOoOOOoOOOoOOOoOOOoOOO
Lol. I'm just being silly. Of course, I love her. In fact she's higher priority to me than my biological family, since she is more family to me than they are. I love my family but they don't respect me or treat me like family should. Anyone who actually knows me already knows this.


 11. How are you today:
I don't know, I have a mix of emotions because I have been stressed lately. I am very tired, but also looking forward to spending real time with my best friend when her schooling is over, and helping her to have more freedom.


 12. Favorite Drink?
I don't know if I have a favorite drink. I really do love Monster Energy M80 (the yellow one with 80% juice), but I can't have it very often, mainly because it's too expensive. Besides, I don't want to become dependent on any kind of substance, whether it be food, alcohol, drugs, or any other chemicals. Caffeine is not healthy either, even though the M80 Monster drink is a lot healthier than other Energy drinks are.


 13. Favorite Alcoholic drink:
I never get to drink, so wouldn't know. But, the most delicious tasting alcoholic drinks I ever had were home-made by my sister Jenn. That's why I think she could make a kick-ass bartender. (I have fun memories from us inventing the "red lemons" drink".)


 14. Favorite Sports:
Sex?
Lmao. That's not a sport... Is it?
I just don't like sports.

 
 15. What's your hair Color:
Right now? Or the one I was born with? Or is it something else? Well, right now, I'm not sure. It's an odd brown color these days.


 16. Eye Color:
Dark brown from far away. But if you look close enough, they actually really look green and yellow.

 
 17. Do you wear contacts?
Nope. I have before, but only for fun, because my vision is supposedly "perfect". During my years in High School, on Halloween, I would wear only a single Honey-Brown colored contact, which my sister Lisa lent me. That way, I had one light brown eye, and one dark brown eye. Then people would trip out over my bi-colored eyes, wondering if they had always been that way. Lol.


 18. Siblings:
I have three older sisters, two of which are fraternal twins. Right now Lisa is 30, and I think that Jenn and Victoria are 33. I happen to be 22, so yeah, there's a gap there.
Oh no, we're getting old!


 19. Favorite Month?
    I don't supposed I've ever had a favorite month, aside from December being the best month for me when I was a kid. Of course that was solely because of how awesome Christmas break used to be, being able to see my dad and my sisters, and celebrating two Christmases due to my parents being separated. Anyway, these days, I have no idea what my favorite month is, because Christmas has pretty much died in my life, and I don't know how to revive it.
    January through April would be my favorite part of the year if I were actually able to celebrate birthdays...


 20. Favorite Food?
I don't have a favorite food either, mainly because the only foods that are available for me to eat, are all things that make me sick or give my body a lot of trouble in some way. I do miss having great food (the non-spicy versions) such as Cornbread, Mashed Potatoes, Italian Cheese Bread, and the Apple Burritos that don't exist anymore.


 21. Last Movie you watched:
That's a tough one, since it's been a long while. I think Wayne's World?


 22. Favorite Day of the Year:
    Favorite Day? Damn, I don't know. Any day where I get to spend plenty of time with my best friend, and lover, doing something fun, like role-playing... then if I could end the day with great sex, good sleep and creative lucid dreams, that'd make it perfect... e-e  Then again, that's more a description of a perfect day I really wish I could have, rather than a Favorite Day of the Year. So I don't have a Favorite Day of the Year, because every day is different, though most of my days seem so boring or depressing.
    (Yeah, I am a "nymphomaniac" and love sex, but it's not my life. I just keep mentioning it because I don't get to express my sexuality like I need to, which tends to make me sad as well as emotionally unstable.)


 23. Are you too shy to ask someone out:
It depends on what you mean by "asking someone out". I have never gone dating and I never will, at least in the stereotypical sense of the word "dating", which I think is stupid. On the other hand, if you meant that as in simply asking to go somewhere with someone, then I would go ahead and do it, because my "shyness" is not going to stop me from doing something that I really want... At least not anymore. I'm a woman, not a girl.


 24. Which one Summer or Winter:
I like Summer nights, as long as they aren't hot, and especially if they are both warm and rainy. Otherwise, extreme temperatures in general simply bother me too much.


 25. Hugs or Kisses?
Depends on who is doing it, and why.


 26. Chocolate or Vanilla:
I would have to say both at the same time. I don't like Chocolate much, especially by itself, which is something I won't eat unless my low blood-sugar is screaming at me. The rest of my crazy woman family on the other hand, loves chocolate. I would rather just have Vanilla ice cream with Mint flavor, and Cookie Dough, because I think that is the greatest.


 27. Do you want your friends to write back:
    I'm only sending this to Enel and Dethy. Yes, it would be great to hear any response, especially from Enel, though I don't have expectations either way.
    Everyone else I know is too busy and/or doesn't care enough to keep in touch with me.

 
 28. Who is most likely to respond to e-mails:
Well, like I said, I'm only sending this to Enel and Dethy. If you mean to emails in general, then nobody will respond to my emails anyway, because those emails don't exist. I don't write to anybody, because I have nobody to write to, or else wouldn't want to, unless it's Enel. And I could just talk to Dethy on a messenger or in person. So pleh.


 29: Who is least likely to respond to e-mails: 
Anyone who isn't Enelevrinn Michelle Romisius.


 30. Living Arrangements:
My living arrangements have been the same for two years or so, in this small apartment with my lover, in a city that I have come to hate, which is in a state that I really only like because of the climate, and because Enel lives here. Hopefully, though, Enel will be living with me soon, which gives me the motivation to live and to do things again. That's because this is something I have wanted for many years. Enel gives me energy, and that's something that no one else can do (except for Monster Energy, which isn't a person).


 31. What books are you reading:
Right this second I am reading this survey. I haven't exactly kept up on reading ever since Dethy moved in with me. This is for several reasons, although I have been wanting to read Animorphs books again. I guess I have (half-assedly) started to read Animorphs perhaps twice this year, but didn't even get through half a book. Unfortunately that's it.


 32. What's on your mouse pad:
    This cheap one I have been using is red and says "Office DEPOT" in white text.
    The last time Enel was here, she gave me a new one with a wolf on it. Yay!


 33. Favorite Board Game:
Board game? I dunno. One that doesn't exist? Otherwise I like my version of Sorry, because it's more interesting and like a strategy game which uses dice as well as cards. But I like video-games and computer games better.


 34. What did you do last night:

It's a little hard to remember everything since I've been so tired lately. Yesterday I was just involved in fixing things up and trying to make plans for new living arrangements. Basically what I did was clean and rearrange the house, mostly the Master Bedroom. Then at maybe one in the morning I went to bed.


 35. Favorite Smells:
Um? It's been so long since I smelled something very good, I don't remember what smells I like. o-o; Lately I really only ever get to experience smells that are not nice, such as spicy foods, overwhelming chemical smells and stuffy air. Oh well... I guess when the weather gets warmer, I'll get to smell fresh air again.


 37. What inspires you?
    Being with my best friend, having dreams to live in, and good memories. Reading, day-dreaming, and role-playing can also be inspiring. My characters and other story stuff are the closest thing I have to feeling like I'm at home in this life, so of course that's important and inspiring to me.
    By the way, what happened to number 36 and 38?


 39. Favorite Flower:
    I don't know many Earthly flowers at all, or at least their names. I just know that they're fun to look at and smell. And since I'm weird, having flowers around would just make me want to touch and play with them, which would probably end up killing them.
    My favorite flower would be one that doesn't exist in this dimension. It's one that is very huge, very red, very pretty, and very delicious to eat. NOM NOM.


 40. What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?
If I happen to remember my dream, I'll think about that for a while. After that, my brain usually snaps right back to whatever I was thinking about before I went to bed, so that I can continue with my life. And that is how my life goes on... The end?



Signed, Taelle Oreseth
Posted in freedom and honesty. Sunday, April 05, 2009 at 07:21 pm.

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