Welcome to my Blog
I am on a spiritual quest for healing
And to find my freedom from fear and self-induced limitations


Self Induced Limitations = Limited Growth
And I will not accept unnecessary limitations anymore.

I created this site because I needed to do a lot of serious spiritual venting.
For once, I am going to refuse to dislike myself.
I am also going to be honest with my thoughts and feelings.
If no one else, I must be honest with myself.
And above all, I must love myself.


I am a female. At least in this one physical life. And it doesn't really matter anyway.
The age of my current body has nothing to do with who I am, either.
Since I was a small child, I have had to endure many physical and emotional difficulties.
These include dysmorphophobia, chronic depression, chronic fatigue, low blood sugar and more.
I have experienced more trauma, abuse and loneliness in this life than my family may ever know.
I have undergone much emotional, spiritual, and intellectual bondage and abuse.
Not to mention that this has had incredibly negative impacts on my physical health as well.
And how did I live through the fact that my hardships were viewed as non-existent...
And that unrealistic expectations were constantly placed upon me.
I was raised into poverty, and am still struggling to get out of it.
Ultimately, I have also been rendered emotionally broken and socially dysfunctional.
But I have also survived. Changes shall manifest.


I am much stronger than people realize.


Epiphany #1: One particular organized religion has been the main cause of my life's tragedies.
Epiphany#2: Religion was a good idea, but just one of many concepts that has been warped and abused by humans.
Epiphany #3: Mormonism is a vicious pattern that has created misery and toxic relationships in my life, as well as others.
Epiphany #4: My mother loves me despite perpetual patterns of abuse. It's all she knows.


At the core, we are all lightworkers of goodness and love.
I am continually developing and healing, just as every soul is designed to do.
Although I am spiritually depressed and homesick much of the time, I also know I am not alone in this world.
It is time for human beings to evolve, and to move into a new age of peace, healing and love.

And it is also time for me to openly express myself!
My thoughts and emotions should be shared, not oppressed, and not repressed.
I do not intend to oppress nor offend anyone.
After all, diversity is a blessing, and needs to be accepted.
Diversity allows us to learn, and see things from many different angles and perspectives.
And the ability to truly listen, is far more important than the ability to agree.


Religion, spirituality, and morals, are all very separate things.
My intentions are solely in favor of open-mindedness, knowledge, spiritual growth and love.
And refusal to think freely and independently is disrespectful to yourself.
One should wield intellectual and free thought as a natural characteristic. Because it is.
What organized religion has taught me,
is that it religion is against real wisdom and freedom,
since its purpose is to control and abuse others.
To obey authority without question has too much room for oppression and abuse.
Without questioning, there is no learning. And without learning, there is no growth.
And where is the reflection of love; the core energy of which we are made?


I pray for the badly needed reform of this violent world.
I must express that there are loving alternatives to authoritarian organizations and religions,
and these alternatives can be more spiritually fulfilling and enjoyable than they may ever know.


We, as human beings, are not in the dark ages anymore.
So let us evolve and reflect that fact.


In Love and Peace,
~Mistress Taelle~






Welcome to Spiritual Freedom



Hi.

I am known as Taelle, or Mistress.

         If you don't already know me, then this site probably isn't for you. This is one of my journals, also known as a blog. I initially created this site because I want to be totally honest with myself and revive the good habit of keeping a journal. I want to be free to express myself, spiritually and otherwise.
         So here I am, and here it is:  My blog of Spiritual Freedom.




Things About Me

Evidently I am indigo and crystal soul. I am a very evolved and seasoned soul who often feels homesick, since Earth is not my true home. In relation to the earth angel realms I am many things. I consider myself a wolf, sorceress, elemental, angel, mermaid and starsoul. I am romantic and sensual. I am secretive, mysterious, more than shy of socializing but playful and creative. I am extremely sensitive... I have a residual anger towards humans but I will show them understanding and compassion anyway... even when they don't return it.

I have found my twin flame and I will always love him and be with him.

I love animals. I love wolves, kitties, dragons, dragonflies, unicorns, butterflies, and many other creatures. I love art, creativity, affection, fun and laughter. I love nature, rain and thunderstorms. I love water, and swimming. I am interested in astrology, astronomy, spirituality, oracle cards and various methods of divination. I love technology and magic. I love music. I also enjoy movies and games, especially computers and videogames. I love books and stories, and hope to finish writing my own. I love dreams and am largely fascinated by them... I love daydreams, fantasy, science fiction, and satire. I love learning.

I love kirbies!



I don't endorse religion.
But I don't condemn those who do.
I simply believe in Spirituality,
Open-mindedness and Integrity,
Freedom of Expression,
Understanding and Acceptance,
And most of all, LOVE.

Love is of the greatest importance,
In the entire universe.
And I would unravel and die
Before my soul ever believes otherwise.




I love my family.
I love my twin flame.
I love my best friend,
who is also my family.
I always strive to love others,
Whether I know them or not.
And even those who hate me,
I cannot hate them back,
Because hate constricts growth.
And love can heal anything.

This love is unconditional.
Despite confusion and conflicts.
And so, I must also accept myself,
And try to love myself,
No matter what.
Love is all that truly matters.

And our world is immensely suffering from such lack of its use.
Ego is NOT an appropriate
substitute for Love.
Ego keeps us from being able to truly love ourselves and others.
Ego creates un-love, which will only create more aspects of un-love.
Ego keeps change from happening.
Ego endorses fear, ignorance, hate and greed.
The policy of "every man for himself" does not work.
People are still hurting each other.
Stop listening to the Ego!

So let's stop waiting.
Everyone needs and deserves Love.
Let's create Love!

The new age is now.






~ I Love You! ~



Feel free to leave comments,
Or messages on the tagboard
Which is located further down.
You can also send email to
iviandara@aim.com

Or instant message me

at Aim:  The Taelle
or
at Yahoo:  cylon_toox

If you are nice, or neutral,
then I won't bite.
However, please do not contact me if you intend to utilize insults, or otherwise have low opinion of me.

Due to note:

I am not a spawn of Satan
I am not misguided
I am wrong or going to hell
I am not stupid
I am not naive
And I am not inferior,
nor superior,
to anyone else.

I am simply on my own path.
This is the way things are.

So please don't be ignorant.
I respect others as individuals.
And I would appreciate the same.
Please be conscientious,
as I too am a soul in need of love.

Otherwise...
Stop wasting your time with my blog.

Thank you.




~ Let's Be Free ~




If confused by the tagboard:

The bottom field is where your nickname or alias goes. The field above that is where you write your message, in order to add it to the existing messages in the largest field. The http:// field is optional, but it's there if you want to contribute an external link. Press the Submit button when you're done.

Have fun?




My iMood:  Read My Feelings
My Lover's iMood:  Read His Feelings
Best Friend's iMood:  Read Her Feelings


   


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The section below, is at least somewhat an expression of who I am.
These are my thoughts on some of the things I believe and don't believe.
I am not preaching "right or wrongs" to anyone.
These are my personal opinions
as everyone is entitled to their own.
So please don't get defensive,
though I can't help it if you read it and are offended.


I Believe -

-  In an obligation to Relax and have Fun.
-  That laughter is a lighthearted necessity.
-  That an uninhibited sense of humor is a refreshing form of enjoyment.
-  That spontaneity is also very refreshing and enjoyable.
-  That refusing to question authority is being disrespectful to yourself and your integrity.
-  That love is real and beautiful.
-  That human beings should love others as well as themselves.
-  That everyone is worthy of love.
-  That, with love, all things can grow.
-  That love knows no bounds.
-  That to view all things and situations with love, is a healing and peaceful way of life.
-  That there is nothing wrong with making mistakes, as long as you are learning from them.
-  That learning, in its various forms, is important, just as knowledge is power.
-  That the "sub-conscious" is just another word for our soul.
-  That, through this "sub-conscious", we can have access to endless knowledge, forgotten memories and other hidden power.
-  That all living beings have souls... With the exception of the little earthly automatons, cells, bacteria, and etc.
-  That earthly (or non-earthly) automatons, including insects, are living things of the earth that deserve respect, although they are not individual spirits.
-  That when we refuse to acknowledge our feelings, use our minds and utilize intellect, we "humans" aren't acting any better than mindless drones. I'm sorry but it just reflects the behavior of a termite colony... Or a Zerg colony. ("LIVE FOR THE SWARM!")
-  That humans are animals too. We are equal to other forms of life, not superior.
-  That reincarnation exists, and that "past lives", "next lives" and "pre existences" have the same meaning.
-  That reincarnation is about choice, and NEVER about punishment.
-  That reincarnation has various purposes, including, but not limited to, spiritual growth, enjoyment and learning.
-  We signed up for what we got... Every single time.
-  That reincarnation is not limited to the human existence, as there are other forms of "intelligent life", and they are just as significant as we are.
-  That Soul Mates exist; in that the actual definition of Soul Mates is, "Living Souls with whom we may have shared various pre-mortal and/or past-life experiences, and have previously agreed to meet once again."
-  That there are many types of Soul Mates.
-  That anyone, even relatives, or seeming "enemies", can be a type of Soul Mate to you.
-  That Soul Mates are here to assist us in our own personal life's journey, and to help heal situations (both past and present), whether we consciously realize it or not.
-  That man created "god" in the image of himself, and not the other way around.
-  That angels exist, as they are simply spirits, but those which resonate of pure love, because that is the energy of what god is.
-  That every living person has at least two guardian angels (or other spirit guides), who are always available to call upon for support.
-  That many guides and angels have been with me throughout my entire life, and that I am never alone.
-  That, because of the divine laws of Free Will, we are in control of our own destiny, and that is also why it is important to pray, and to give "permission" for our guides to "interfere" with our lives and give us assistance.
-  That magic exists, because it is of the same definition as prayer, and any other higher powers that can create miracles through manifestation.
-  That we can pray to call upon blessings, for our needs and desires to manifest.
-  That, for blessings and manifestations to work properly, at least some small degree of belief is required. As long as there is belief and good intent, prayer can work for anyone.
-  That, in order to receive those blessings, we must allow them to happen, and to accept them graciously, without endorsing feelings of guilt or unworthiness.
-  That anyone and anything we encounter is giving us a chance learn something.
-  That everyone has the hidden potential to unlock the secrets of claivoyance and to utilize psychic abilities.
-  That, although there have been many fraudulent practices, lies, and abuse in the subject of psychic power, there are also valid Clairvoyants and Psychic people, throughout history.
-  That true Psychics, far more often than not, are truly very warm and loving people who desire to help others. They just have to make a living for themselves, too.
-  That divination and psychic abilities exist, and are not limited to predicting the future, but can give profound insight to any situation, as well as revealing hidden knowledge about the past, present, and oneself.
-  That the world is entering a new phase right now, not necessarily ending. We are beginning a new age, vibrations are changing, and change is necessary and even inevitable. Besides, there is truly no such thing as an ending without a new beginning.
-  That our subconscious self (our souls) are ALREADY develloped, and all-knowing. We, as physical-based beings, simply struggle to tap into different levels consciousness.
-  That we, our true soul forms, were made as a part of, and are one with, the ultimate divine source (God, Spirit, or whatever you want to call it). We are not separate, and we are not inferior, nor superior.



I Don't Believe -

-  In the Bible, or any other "scriptures" or "gospels" of this world. They are written and changed by men. I cannot appreciate it when anyone takes the Bible seriously or literally. It is an untruthful, oppressive book of man, and it is not of God. However, that doesn't mean that we can't learn from it.
-  In authoritarian Religion. Some people tend to find comfort in it, but I have also seen how much pain and problems it can cause. It's mainly just there to control and manipulate.
-  In the practice of blind obedience.
-  That Satan exists. (Unless he is a crazy mushroom! Lol, not really.)
-  That killing, infliction of pain, or any acts of hate or violence, have EVER been endorsed by GOD. (Don't you remember the commandment, "Thou shalt not kill"?)
-  That God could ever represent or personify anything that is contradictory of pure Love and Acceptance.
-  That God would ever give us orders, especially through the word of man and his writing, and expect us to obey without question.
-  That God could practice or endorse punishment, or ANY form of force at all.
-  That discrimination against a person or living being is EVER justified. Differences should be embraced, not attacked!
-  That there is any such thing as a "superior" gender, race, religion, or otherwise.
-  That the traditional view of "Hell" could EVER exist. But I do believe, that sometimes there is hell in mortality, particularly when humans attempt to judge and punish each other. Yet in the afterlife, there is only "Hell" if we feel that we deserve to be judged and punished as well, and therefore we "condemn" ourselves by inflicting self-torture. But this ends when we realize that everyone deserves love and happiness... Including ourselves!





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Friday, November 28, 2008
I am not happy.

Well at least I started with honest title today.

But even the simplest statement can be interpreted in so many ways, and therefore misinterpreted.

This is not something I am saying because I am choosing to mope about, or even to say "poor me", nor am I keeping myself from being happy or choosing to be unhappy, since I love myself enough to know and feel that I deserve happiness. This is not something I want pity or sympathy for. It is not something that anyone should be made to feel guilty or otherwise bad about, either. It is a simple statement of truth about how my feelings are, and such feelings are not my choice. My only choice in it is what I do with the feelings, the actions that I take in dealing with them, and the way that I treat others, including myself. My feelings are something that I need understanding for, rather than usual judgments from family and others... especially inappropriate assumptions about who I am or what is going on in my life. If no one else, though, I simply need this understanding from my twin flame, so that I don't have to feel completely alone in the world.

Saying something honestly and objectively is not something that should generate any kind of judgmental reaction from people, nor should it cause a reaction that reflects any aspects of unlove whatsoever. Unfortunately, many people tend to react in such a way to any genuine emotions, especially the negative ones. Of course this is often because they can't even understand or deal with their own emotions in the first place. But the simplest fact, is that I need love, empathy and understanding, just like anyone needs and deserves. People should live in love and spread love, not pain. Love is the solution and healer of things. And, I think another important point I wanted humans to realize, is that, feeling pain and spreading pain are two different things, even though humans may often tend to do both at the same time simply because they don't know how else to handle it.

With that said, I still don't know how exactly I am supposed to explain the "why". Why am I not happy? Of course there are reasons. And there are reasons that are too complicated convey. But reasons for feelings shouldn't always have to be explained... It just is. Emotions are the way they are, and I am a sensitive soul. And feelings just need to be shown love as well, no matter what they are.

But just because I have learned to love myself, and that my twin flame is here living with me, it doesn't mean that everything is okay, or that the hardest is over. And things are hard.

Currently I am also suffering from an unpleasant infection that I assume to be the same virus I had much earlier this year, or else something similar... Either way it's been going on for a couple weeks or so... making it very painful to talk, smile or even move my mouth, so of course it's been difficult to eat too. And that's pretty sad, especially considering that I already have a ton of problems with eating at it is.

Speaking of eating, yeah, yesterday was Thanksgiving, although I can't say I had anything to eat that I wanted, or much of anything to eat in the first place. But the important thing is that I got some nice time with my best friend. I would write about what happened yesterday, but now I don't really feel like it anyway.... I do not feel like writing is working at the moment either. Yesterday is then and today is now. And right now I just want to be healthier, and to be able to do things without feeling physically or emotionally miserable. And feeling fairly miserable lately, I don't feel like I can write, or do much of anything. Until I get over this virus, or whatever it is, I don't think I'm going to be feeling particularly great either. Everything is too painful, physically and emotionally.

Maybe someday I will be able to write about what is really going on. And what would make me happy...

I need my dream to live in.


Signed, Taelle Oreseth
Posted in freedom and honesty. Friday, November 28, 2008 at 08:08 pm.

Please comment.

Dethy
November 29, 2008   12:50 AM PST
 
I'm sorry if I've been unpleasant. I love you more than anything. I still have trouble dealing with my emotions, even if I can do things again.

I'm sorry most of all for how I've been to you. I've been very tired. It's hard for me to think anything through, or about anything, so I've been rather thoughtless. I wish more than anything that things could be better. I want to make them better...I wish I knew how. I wonder what I'm supposed to do.

I don't want to worry about anything. I don't want to worry about what our (fairly distant I've realized) financial future is going to be like. I don't want to worry about you being sick or getting worse or any of that stuff. I don't want to worry about us being sick in the future or if I have something or just something bad happening. I don't want to worry about giving the kitty a better life, or having another one, or not being able to spend time with the ones we love. I don't want to worry about not being able to enjoy food. Or worry about not being interestng or being able to discuss anything very well.....

I'm just tired.....I don't want to worry about bad things happening all the time. But....I have enough sense to know that worrying and thinking about things are different things....It's important to think about things, as far as is helpful....Worrying doesn't do any good....

I'm sorry...For how I've been....I've been trying to escape, I guess. I just want to escape. I feel too tired to even think about anything.

I know though, that it's only because of the stress of the holiday season. And dealing with family. And me still feeling sick. I'm not always this tired. I'll be over it. I'm just sorry. I never want to hurt you.....I'm sorry for dealing with things horribly with you.....And not being helpful...

More than anything, I just want to say that I'm sorry...That I love you....That I never wanted to hurt you, and things will be better...I know you hear it from me a lot and it's hard to wait for anything this long.....I don't know if me trying to reassure you hurts more than it helps...But.....I know things are getting better...And they will be better....

I love you more than anything....

I know that we can live in our dreams together....That somehow, they are becoming closer and becoming more one....

There is one thing I'm sure of....Just be with me....And things will be better.....I'm absolutely sure of it...More than anything in this world...I know this because, it's always happened before....It's always worked....Be with me.....I'll be with you...

..I'm sorry for how I've been, how I've treated you thoughtlessly because I can't deal with things because I can't think.....It doesn't have to be this way......Just lay with me....Rest with me....It doesn't matter what we do....Let's just be with each other....And forget the bad things in the world. Let's have our love...And share our love.....And be happy again....If only a little, for now....I want to make the best of this moment...
   

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